Discussing
video game reviews is a very cheap and highly amusing way to pass one's afternoon, provided of course there's no football on TV and everyone involved has more than a passing interest in
video (
or -and that's being truly anal- computer)
games. Extra amusement is guaranteed to those familiar with the repetitive use of adjectives such as
fantastic and ..uhm..
fantastic in the long and frightening tradition of the Greek gaming press. What's more, the whole thing can get pretty serious, as current web discussions keep getting closer to being an almost proper discourse of the subject or, to say the least, a pretty mainstream chat of the wider gaming community, as David Jaffe's latest reviewing of reviews showcased (
hit the link for an example).
Some random blog post eye-candyThen again, beside Mr. Jaffe's well justified wrath, a simple cyber stroll through the gaming halls of
Digg should convince you that everyone has an opinion on how games should be reviewed and seemingly everyone is interested in finding out what said opinion is all about. Obviously, these oh-so-popular opinions tend to touch on a colourful variety of subjects, ranging from the ways games should be graded and the scale that should be used, to whether a game's price or length should be taken into account, or even to whether innovation is a value each game should possess. Interestingly, but seemingly not so obviously, the huge percent of review related opinions are actually opinions regarding video games
per se, as each author, podcaster, vlogger, whatever, is pretty damn sure of what games should be like and accordingly shapes his/her attitude towards reviews and points to what reviewers should be looking for.
Trouble is, a game
should be nothing in particular, as, let's face it, neither god has ever sat down and emailed mankind with a concrete set of rules, nor has nature shown the way to proper game design. As for the equally existing, omnipresent, abstract and conscious
market, let's just say it historically hasn't had an eye for quality and leave it there.
Happily, every form of art (
which, I'm convinced, nobody has succeeded in definitively defining) be it cinema, music, dance, literature or any of the visual bunch, faces the same lack of divine, natural and/or capitalist direction, but I digress. Better stick to games. Even better start with what the video gaming society thinks games should be like. Astonishingly, most answers, varied as they are, are equally valid.
Storytelling and writing definitely matter, but
Tetris isn't such a bad game, is it? Oh, and the audiovisual bit of each game is definitely important, but what about
Zork,
Leather Goddesses of Phobos and
NetHack. As for length, well, excuse the sacrilege, but would anyone in their right mind dare to think of comparing
Ulysses to a poem by Rimbaud? And, really, what is it that makes
World of Warcraft something more than a glorified chatroom and
Wii Sports such an astounding success? Not so easy to decide, is it? And quite a bit contradictory too.
As good as they get...The buyers, are a contradictory lot too, and better not forget that a video game, just like a movie, a novel or a painting, is both a piece of art and a commodity to be traded. This, after all, is capitalism, which is definitely kinder than Sparta ever was to its slaves, but doesn't care much for quality (
or mankind, but that's another subject altogether). Anyway. Everything is a bloody commodity, and vulgar as this might be, commodities can be judged from a consumer's point of view, even though things can get a bit tricky when it comes to anything related to art or personal taste, as the silly positivist quantification of virtues isn't so easily applied.
So, what's a reviewer to do? Well, actually, there's no wrong or right here. It's only a matter of taste and culture, that's heavily influenced by the fact that some reviewers actually ..uh.. review stuff for a living and are thus required to follow certain guidelines. Judging a game by its price can be such a guideline. Or taking its intuitive interface into consideration. Or even originality and art direction. Whatever a magazines or website's stance though, there's a definite lack of standard yardsticks of gaming quality and anyone trying to come up with objective ones, is bound to run into some pretty tough theoretical problems. Proving that a mature and flawless implementation of an already tried idea is less important than a promising but rough new gaming innovation would be such a tricky little thing, mind you.
But, theoretical woes aside, what is the role of a review? Is it a consumer's tool? Is it a critique, and if yes, does it aspire to helping video games evolve in the way -say- Lovecraft's
Supernatural Horror in Literature attempted to guide a certain literary genre towards progress? Can a games journalist separate between high-tech and beautiful? Do you, dear readers, believe the average reviewer would be able to notice decent writing even if it wore a wig and danced while juggling three dildos in front of him, when he (
the reviewer; less usually a she) believes that
Duke Nukem 3D is a genuinely funny experience and that
Half Life's banal storyline is monumental? What of the fanboys? Don't you think that the fan base of a game and the inherent populism of big gaming sites can influence a review? How about the game's expected sales? And what if a professional reviewer's honesty is not always taken for granted, which, judging by the average
Doom 3 reviews, shouldn't be such a preposterous thought?
Answers on a postcard please (
alternatively -preferably even- in the comments section, provided any of the 15 people frequenting the Lair are interested in further discussing the subject). Oh, and
vision doesn't sell copies.
As for me, well, any review that's well written (
preferably funny), tries to honestly describe the game and treats it at least as seriously as it would treat a mainstream movie is good enough...
The aptly named Cheapass Games, legendary creators of Kill Dr. Lucky and grand slashers of prices, are offering over a dozen free board games for you (and me) to print and enjoy. Where? Over at their double-secret website of course. Games offered include the OOP Huzzah!, Brain Baseball (playable with a standard deck of cards), Bogart, Renfield and the utterly brilliant Roll Out the (Gun) Barrels wargame.
