Cutting Edge: Morrowind mods...

Apparently people have been drooling over Oblivion. According to reviews and lustful moans everywhere, people are probably right too. Still, Oblivion costs money. Morrowind mods don't. And I'm not talking about the simple add-a-texture or modify-to-hit-tables mods, but about full-blown total conversion, relive-the-experience attempts.

The first one goes by the sad name Ashes of Apocalypse. It's a tacky, sci-fi post-apocalyptic affair, with a not-so-medieval soundtrack and FPS aspirations. Of course it fails. Tragically. The poor thing unfortunately looks like this:

Then, there is the Wizards' Islands mod (or according to its creators the unofficial expansion). This one is actually good and provides more than 20-30 gameplay hours, very good visuals, new cities and will even walk the dog and fix you coffee. All you'll need is Morrowind (obviously) and a 20th level character... Ah, the pic:

A close contender to Wizard's Islands' throne of quality is the Sword of the Perithia mod, which offers a new (and not improved) storyline, more than a 100 NPCs, new monsters, new weapons, new grammar, the full monty. Doesn't look bad either:

Then again, you could give Sea of Destiny -and not density- a try. But, I won't get into that. Nope, no screenshot either... Try to enjoy.

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Related Gnome's Lair articles-posts: a Quake mod without guns, the Ultima V mod, a DOOM 3 mod and a nice list of hand picked freeware games.



Related Tags: Elder Scrolls, Morrowind, The Elder Scrolls, Mod, Mods, Total Conversion, Expansion, Expansions, Game, Games, PC Game, PC Games, RPG, CRPG, RPGs, free, freeware, weblog, blog, Entertainment

Museum Monday #7

Monday. The day right between Sunday and Tuesday, and definitely not a particularly good one. I hate Mondays. Really. Not very inspiring either, are they? Of course they aren't. I can't even write a decent introduction to this Monday's virtual Museum.

Oh, sod it. Just follow the link to the amazing (really) Infocom Gallery. I guess you know what you'll find there. Good. Here's a teaser:

Related Tags: Zork, Infocom, Adventure, Monday, Museum, Weblog, Virtual Museum, Game, Games, Retro, Adventures

Space Quest 4 Easter Eggs

Imagine you are Roger Wilco, Sierra's pathetic but sort of heroic space janitor. Imagine you are on a Quest for the Space Quest IV easter eggs. What would you do? Probably something rather silly and quite fatal, so don't. Heed my advice. Do as I tell you. Always. (ahem)

Anyway. Just get yourself a time-machine, preferably the Timebuster 2000 SUX the Sequel Police have parked inside an arcade in Space Quest X. Save. Type the code you see on the following screenshot (click for a larger view):

Good. You are now on the dangerous planet Ortega from Space Quest III: The Pirates of Pestulon.

Exit the Timebuster. Die.

Restore, and learn that gnomes aren't always to be trusted.

Now, enter this code:

Enjoy something pointless. This:No more easter eggs for you. For more on Space Quest IV, on the other hand, you'll just have to wait for my review and walkthrough, that will appear on the next issue of Adventure Lantern. For further adventure related articles you can have a look at my review of Spooks, the AGS 2005 Awards or a Sam and Max video.

Related Tags: Space Quest, Space Quest 4, Space Quest IV, Roger Wilco, Sierra, Adventure, Adventures, Adventure games, easter egg, easter eggs, Game, Games, PC, video game, video games, Vintage, Entertainment, Funny

Episode VI: The Return of the Warhammer Rumors

Let's get one thing clear. There is a difference between a rumor and a fact, and everybody knows it. Accordingly, everybody is aware of the truth, that a fact that has just been announced constitutes news. No news, good news, but that's not the point. Anyway, without any particular reason, I'll start with the things that Games Workshop has already announced, thus the news:

-The new starter Warhammer boxed set will be called Battle for Skull Pass and it will include more than 100 miniatures (Goblins and Dwarfs) and a condensed version of the new rulebook.
-The new Giant is already available for advance order and is one of the (component-wise) richest minis ever released. There is also a nice interactive construct your own Giant-thingy over at GW.
-The goblins will get their Spider Riders (and apparently Forest Goblin too), which will more or less look like this one.

On, to the rumors then:
-According to a certain website this picture should provide us with detailed information on the Warhammer boxed set:

-Orcs and Goblins will be released right after the release of Battle for Skull Pass boxed set.
-Then the full blown 7th edition Warhammer rulebook should follow, which might include changes in the magic system and the combat resolution bonuses, but for such speculation you should take a look at what the rumor experts at Warseer have to say.

Finally, if you are interested in more Warhammer related stuff, get surprised by either clicking here, here, here or even here.

Related Tags: Warhammer, Games Workshop, Rumor, Rumors, Rumour, Rumours, News, Goblins, Orcs, WHFB, Miniatures, Miniature, Wargames, Game, Games

PC (meta) Review: 'Lula 3D'

To be quite honest, the way this review was written was heavily inspired by the review summaries posted by dear Elderly Gamer over at his excellent blog. To be even more honest, pc game pr0n (porn for the old-fashioned) has been something of an interest since my days in elementary school, when I first laid my poor innocent eyes on the exquisite Leisure Suit Larry in the Land of the Lounge Lizards.

Now, being the much older git that I am, and having avoided the previous Lula offerings, I decided to buy Lula 3D. Not only was it featuring naked ladies engaging in gratuitous sexual acts, not only was it the first game ever to incorporate the Bouncing Boobs technology, it was also quite cheap (less than 20 euros). Apparently cheap in every respect.

Being of course cheap isn't necessarily a bad thing. Lula 3D does have a certain charm, in the way Plan 9 from Outer Space, Dungeons and Dragons the Movie and Jesus Christ Vampire Slayer do. It's so unbelievably bad it is almost interesting and enjoyable. Mind you, it's not funny per se. The funny thing is that people decided to sell this kind of crap and I decided to buy it. And there is no such thing as a Bouncing Boobs technology. Lara Croft in the first incantation of Tomb Raider had bouncier assets. It's neither particularly entertaining, nor sexy (unless of course you are really sad), and even though Lula 3D is (supposedly) an adventure game, it's such a poor experience, that having a dog hump your leg sounds exciting and fun.

And here comes the Elderly Gamer inspired bit. I'll present you with what a series of esteemed publications had to say about this sorry excuse for interactive erotica, but before that please imagine this: all of Lula's inventory is stored in her extra-small bra. Anyway. On to the pros:

Eurogamer (2/10): 'So, to conclude, let's return to the Lula 3D box. Turn it over and you'll see a warning message which reads: "CAUTION: intense erotic scenes may lead to CHOKING, SWEATING and RAPID HEART BEAT." No one could argue with this as a general statement of fact, but with regard to Lula 3D, the words RAPID BANGING OF HEAD AGAINST MONITOR would be more appropriate.'

PC Zone (31/100): 'As lovely as it must be to live in Lula-land, with its never-ending intercourse and women who won't talk about anything other than dildos, I still think that I prefer having sex with real people. It's a strange hang-up of mine - I'm sure I'll get over it.'

Jolt (1.8/10): 'Lula herself would probably be the only person to gain any satisfaction from Lula 3D as, to lower ourselves to using the game'’s terminology, she “loves fucking– and Lula 3D is fucking awful.'

Metacritic (19/100)

Gnome's Lair: that's a (three and a half) out of (ten).

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The non-meta Gnome's Lair reviews include (among other games): Apprentice Deluxe, Star Wars Battlefront 2 and Spooks. On the other hand, stay in style, be cheap, and have a look at some nice free games.


Related Tags: Lula 3d, Lula, CDV, erotic, review, reviews, PC, Game, Games, Video, Adventure, Adventures, Entertainment, Adult, Humor, funny

Where is the Home of the Underdogs?

Well, here it is, and it should be back at its normal URL soon. Just thought I'd let you know... And in case anyone was wondering, the 'Home of the Underdogs' is the oldest, biggest and best abandonware games site this side of the galaxy.

(Update) Try this link instead... http://www.underdogs.kirit.com/
(Update #2) This link is even better ;)


Related Tags: Home of the Underdogs, News, Link, URL, Abandonware